intense week

My heart is racing. it has been a weird week. there is so much to do and so little structure in my time. i have o discipline myself and self impose a routine. I lose track of time and goals. I question if this is the right path. I miss the love/hate relationship I had with my stressful sometimes boring full time job. I miss the constant pay and not having to justify every penny and every invoice and quote and contract. It may sound odd, but figuring out the fair price and living life at its fullest with unbent work-ethic and passion and wisdom is a full time job. I want to start and live my life in full honesty. Because one you bend your rules one never knows what essential rule will require bending against your will.

Anyway, something big is going to happen. I feel it in the air. All our senses are awakened, and we are all a little tired, physically and emotionally, and tense. I bike every day, even if only for a mile. The wind buzzing by my ears, the brisk air, the adrenaline, my legs working hard pedaling...

I am working on a video for Caleb's first birthday. I consolidated all the videos I took of him this past year, and we'll make it fun and artistic. A sweet memory for him to have for the years to come. Conrad like to splurge his family by spending money. I like to work hard to give unique gifts, like this video. I'm not a good gift giver. I rarely have the best ideas or the most accommodating budget. But I always try my best.

I hope this week will go by soothly, and I pray that whatever is good and soon to happen, to come our way fast and easy. I pray that God will do His mighty work with us and in us. I pray that I can see the path clearly...