Sunday class refreshment

It was good we went to the Sunday class before church. A few concepts were refreshed in my mind and heart. The energizing cycle, we had the concept in the back of our minds and probably acted accordingly in a non active way, but sometimes to do good is more that not do wrong and coast the inertia.
I am the one who know my husband in the deepest and most authentic and vulnerable way, and I can build his strength and encourage him to be the best he was created to be. Also, respect him, his being, his soul and self. That is despite his actions or performance. The way I expect him to love me unconditionally.
As I try to remember the conflicts we had in the past year, and become aware of my body language, if it's condescending or mean or disrespectful, I realize what I do most often is lower my shoulder in disappointment, and cry while sadness takes over, all this as I sit in silence facing Conrad. I had to stop and reassure Conrad that my disappointment is not in him, but in the frustration that I can't make my point across, that we are having an argument, that he is stubborn and doesn't agree with me, but almost always we become closer after we sweat through an argument until we get on a common ground.
I am cerebral by construction, and even if in the past I was not the best debater, I learned to be very eloquent in my discussions with Conrad. Use few words that can explain best my feelings, the context, the desired outcome, the solution, suggest a plan etc. It takes a lot of energy to do so, but we have accomplished so much by communicating effectively.
I carry my own weight ...and sometimes that doesn't leave much room for grace. Sometimes I wish I was not so calculated and steps ahead in my approach. Making genuine mistakes helps me relate better to Conrad, because he is a very gracious man... and I love the way he welcomes me in in arms and comforts me and protects me, forgives me and loves me unconditionally.

It was good to go to class. It was good to worship God today in church. It was good to pray this evening with mom and dad...